My Favorite Quote

Since it's hanging in my room at school, was pinned on my pinterest, instagramed, facebooked, and is in hebrew on my arm-candy, I figured maybe it was something I should share with you all.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

I'm not sure when this quote became my favorite, or when I decided to get it engraved on my jewelry, but it has become something that is a part of me.

We all wander this world and tend to be just a part of a crowd. But think about the ones that you love. They are your everything, they are your universe, without them there would be no reason to live. This is exactly what my favorite quote depicts. The fact that the world may not know you to be someone special, great, or even significant. You are a part of the crowd. But, to those you love (either romantically or for other purposes) you are not just a face in the crowd, you are their world.

I like the idea of this quote because regardless of your thoughts on love, romance, or anything of those matters, it stands true. We all have those rare and few people in our life who make this quote for us undeniably relevant and the truth.

And, for those of us who are romantics we can't help but think that there is someone out there who one day will make us their world.

a part of your world (had to quote the little mermaid here...)

XO,

MB

I'm Alive! I'm Alive!

So, I havent posted in a while maybe because my social life is just so wild (ha!) or beause I am totally committed to my internship and can't seem to find time to not be thinking or working towards it (this, is true. . . sadly.)

But, when I came across this article, I had to repost it. Read it peeps. Have fun. It's fabulous.

I'll be back soon to post about love, life, and other mysteries.

XO,
Melissa

Those three words are said too much, its not enough.

Listen in when people around you say goodbye on the phone, and more often than not, they say "love you" or "love ya" or some other version  of the phrase. Sure it could be to their husband, child, parent, etc. but it also tends to be to a friend (either girl or boy) or someone other than a family member.

In relationships, when you say that first "I love you" it can be really nerve-wracking... but is also considered a huge turning point in a relationship. I know that when I've said it it's been a scary emotional experience but that is intended to express the emotions that are running through my head. And, girls love to gossip about who said "I love you" first, how it was said, and do you feel the same way towards the guy. It seems as if the guy is always supposed to express it first.

I agree saying I love you can be a big deal and definitely has emotional baggage, but as of recent I've been pondering the thought of whether those three words are enough. After listening to friend's countless breakups and heartaches I can't help but wonder if those three words can oftentimes be used to stand in for genuine emotion and affection.

I'd rather spend time with a loved one and see how much they care about me (and show them how much I care for them) rather than just tell them "I love you." It is much easier to say a sentence than demonstrate true emotions which gets to the core of things.

And back to my issue with social media and texting.... if we are constantly saying "love ya" and "I love you" on wall posts, via text, and through other forms of social media, are we abusing those terms? Are we just throwing around the words that are supposed to demonstrate and replicate an emotion that should be one of the strongest?

I think we need to stop using the three word phrase so casually and show those who we love (whether its a SO, family member, etc) how much we love them before just blurting out words.

So, here's to showing those who you love how much you really love them, and hoping they can do the same in return!

love.love.love
M

post title stolen from : this great song

Sex... or Chocolate?!

Found something interesting online and thought I'd pass it along...

An online survey, which examined how singles feel about food and its relationship to dating, was conducted by TODAY.com and Match.com. Four thousand singles participated, answering questions about their dating habits, turn-ons and turn-offs.

And now to my favorite finding (and the core of this blog post)....

When asked if someone would rather give up food or sex for a year, those people who said they would choose to keep food over sex said they'd do it for only two favorite items:  Chocolate cake was number one. Number two? A big steak!

...who doesnt want this?!

In the same study, over 90 percent of male participants said that a dinner date is perfect when you're starting to see someone…. (someone tell me where these guys are!)

check out the full article here.

enjoy :)
m

Not Lonely, Just Alone

Have you ever been there? Someone asks you if you have a significant other or if you’re dating anyone… and you have to answer “no.”

 Now, there are some ways to say that no, for example: “no I actually just got over a relationship so I’m taking some time for myself” or “I’m loving being single, actually”… but no matter the answer, the person then looks at you with pity as if being single is really sad and that your life may not be as joyous or love-filled as others who may answer that question with “yes.”

The Pity Face: also known as a look of genuine concern, as if something is absolutely wrong with you. Like you've just admitted you have some illness or disease that’s incurable. (Usually is associated with “don’t worry, you’ll meet someone someday” or “it’s ok, you just haven’t found the right guy yet!”)

Why is that? Is it that terrible to be alone? Or do people just assume If you’re alone that must mean you either cannot find a compatible partner or you are in fact not compatible with others yourself? Apparently they believe you’re that sad character scooping huge chunks of ice cream out of the container in your oldest sweat pants in front of the television alone on a Saturday night…. I’m pretty sure their pity is a reassurance in a narcissistic way that the person responding to your singleness is secretly happy that… they are not you.

But, prove them wrong—little do they know, your Saturday nights are just as fun (if not more fun… hey! you get to hit on multiple men...) than theirs are.

As much as I would love to have a boyfriend and someone to call mine, this past year of being single has been one of the greatest times of my life. I have learned more about myself and who I am than I ever expected. And going on dates and learning to find conversation topics with even the duds you might be stuck grabbing drinks with, is a great learning tool (and a great way to get free drinks, food, and tickets to entertainment events... hehe!)

But back to the whole pity thing. There are three ways to deal with it:

1)      get angry and defend yourself for being single and how it’s by choice

2)      complain and say how horrible it is and how you just want to find someone already

3)      tell the person that the look on their face is offensive and call them out for their judgment

None of the three are guaranteed to work, but are probably the options you have as a single person receiving the dreaded “pity face.”

So, next time someone asks you if you have a significant other, try one of the three above, or simply respond with “I’m not lonely, I’m alone.”

alone, but having lots of fun...

M

“True love is your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.”

So last night while watching Wedding Crashers for the 100^th time, I came across a scene where Owen Wilson tries to woo Rachel McAdams with a corny love quote. His sole intention at first is to get in bed with her, until he realizes that he seems to genuinely want to get to know her (and even more-so once he figures out that she has a boyfriend.) And, she eats it right up… and even uses his corny quote in her speech as the MOH in her sister’s wedding.

“True love is your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.”

While this is a silly movie, this quote stuck with me.

In the study of communications, it has been found that in fact opposites do not attract. While many would argue against this, it has been statistically proven that at first maybe opposites do attract like a magnet, but eventually a relationship between people who are drastically different will fall apart or deteriorate.

Why? You may ask…

Well, in order to be compatible with someone, it seems you must have enough in common (whether it be morals, political viewpoints, etc) in order to get along. (Think of that one person you cannot stand, and why you cannot stand them… probably because they have different viewpoints than you have.)

On the surface, some people may seem to be opposites and have a very functional relationship. Take my parents, for example… mom’s type-A, and pretty serious, while dad’s the typical jokester. But, deep down they have very similar views on a multitude of subjects. And whala! Great relationship.

For those who would argue “well I’m sooo different from the person I’m dating and we are in love” that’s a lie. Eventually you’ll realize you have more in common than you believe you originally did, and that is what the driving force is behind the success of the relationship.

But now, back to the quote.

First off, I love the quote. I feel that it epitomizes what I’ve tried to say about love all along: that something inside you just feels it. Something realizes that the other person is right for you, belongs with you, and is meant for you. Yes, corny as always, but hey! Just go with it. Sometimes you need that other person to complete you… to finish your sentences… to just be around.

So, my soul will continue to be on the hunt for its counterpoint, so that one day, it is complete.

Until then,

M

Friends, Lovers, or Nothing?

We all remember that infamous quote in When Harry Met Sally when Harry and Sally debate whether a man and a woman can be friends. Of course, Sally says they can… and Harry says it’s nearly impossible because at some point the man wants to sleep with the woman. I had a similar debate with someone yesterday.

I have friends of the opposite sex who I am extremely close with. I’d consider them some of my best friends. But, according to most, this won’t last long.  To me, this seems ridiculous and immature… so I decided to do a little research.  (Below is a little snippet of what I found for those interested)

Within these boundaries of gender generalizations, the vast majority of post-pubescent, heterosexual men will invariably have a sexual desirability "reflex" upon seeing a female of reproductive age. Thus the immediate discrimination that a male will make when encountering a female is whether or not he'd like to have sex with her. While some women might acknowledge this sexual "reflex" too, it is likely that they can quickly get past it and focus on the non-sexual aspects of the male with whom they're relating. On the one hand, sperm is physiologically cheap, extremely plentiful, and constantly replenished. Therefore, the more often and diversely a male spreads his sperm the more evolutionally successful he'll be. Ova, on the other hand, are very precious, metabolically expensive, and can not be replenished (a woman is born with all the eggs she'll ever have).Thus women are more able to move beyond the immediate sexual attraction inherent in inter-gender relationships so they can more thoroughly determine the overall suitability of a potential mate. Men, it seems, often have no such long-term agenda so the "one track mind" of sexual interest persists much longer. In general, then, one can say that men are very sexually "reflexive" while women are apt to be more sexually "reflective."

So basically, it’s deeply engrained in us as a member of a specific gender.

But what now? Do I accept the fact that at some point a friend (who is more like a brother to me) will have these feelings whether he decides to disclose them or not? Or, do I just pretend I never read the article and continue being “bff”?

I think that there needs to be an updated version for this day-in-age of male and female friends. Back when women remained in the home, there might have been a different sentiment if they were off being "friendly" with other men other than their significant other. Today, when women are  prominent figures in the workplace AND the home, it seems as if times are changing.

Just a thought to ponder on a warm sunny day.

Friends, Lovers, or Nothing (as John Mayer would say..)

M

Closing Time, Time for You to Go Out to the Places You Will Be From

To keep with the optimism I seem to have captured in this blog, I decided to use Semisonic’s 1998 hit, “Closing Time.” First, if you haven’t heard it, here ya go (listen to it…. But then come back!) :

Regardless of your interpretation of the lyrics of this song, there is one resonating quote towards the end of the song that most people my age either title a Facebook album or use as a way to express some sort of false sentimental value, but actually means a lot more than just its nine words.

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”

I’ve touched briefly on the subject before, but I believe the lyrics interpretation hold true. Sometimes, even when things seem to be going wrong or it seems as if everything is slipping away from your fingertips, that’s just the beginning of something else. Have you ever had that moment where you feel as if you’re down in the dumps, and then something miraculous happens? You may not realize it at the time, but you reflect later and see how that ending led to something else. Sometimes when one door closes, another opens, is a similar mentality.

While I admit, it’s hard to think this way in the moment, if we all could take a step back and think this way it might benefit us all. Thinking that with everything bad that happens a good thing might come of it might be a little bit TOO optimistic, but why not.

For example, when you break up with that guy who you thought was “the one” who made your heart melt, who made you giddy every time he smiled at you…yeah, your life will suck for a little while, and you might be completely miserable… but eventually you’re not, and you move on, and you’re ok. And it’s at that moment where you realize what about that fantastic person wasn’t so fantastic… or, what you want from the next person you embark on a relationship with. You learn who you are, what your needs are, and how some of that amazing stuff was probably created in your head because of the love that blinded you from seeing maybe the “real truth.”

But, it applies to everything in life besides love, although we all know that’s my favorite topic. When you graduate or when you move past one phase of your life, new things happen. You meet new people, learn more about yourself, and continue to constantly grow and shape and mature into the person that you were meant to be.  Some people may say it is some higher power … but I think it’s a little bit of fate.

Everyone has a destiny, and all of those ups and downs ultimately lead them to reach it… no matter how rough the going gets, or how tough it seems to me… I have faith we all end up where we are supposed to be.

Waiting, hoping, wishing,

M

Updating the Fairytale

I have been told that the way I think about love is either from a movie (yes its true) or some sort of fairytale that according to most, will never come true. But, I’m going to reject that theory. While I may have thought about that “fairytale” differently when I was younger, I have constantly been updating it.

Who’s to say that it has to stay the same your whole life?

I recently looked up the definition of fairytale and came across this one: a story in which improbable events lead to a happy ending. But, why does it have to be improbable? If you dictate your own life, and you choose the paths that you ultimately take, cant your dreams still come true? No, I’m not talking about a prince showing up in a horse drawn carriage and waltzing over to me bending down on one knee and miraculously producing a 5 carat ring from his pants pocket, although that’d be kind of nice, I’m talking about the adult updated version of that story.

For those of you who are married, isn’t your hubby your prince charming? Didn’t he rescue you from a life of solitude? He may not look like a prince from a Disney movie and may not always say or do the right things, but he’s the guy who loves you unconditionally, is there through the good and the bad, and is a built in best friend. While your life may not look like Cinderella’s (after she is rescued by the prince,) it is your version of a fairytale. Your updated adult mature version.

We need to erase the dictionary definition of fairytale and replace it with, “when a set of events leads to a happy ending.” It doesn’t need to involve fairies or childhood stories, but it can involve the events of your life that ultimately lead to your happiness. It is a more optimistic version.

If we walk around with the mentality that fairytales are childish and improbable, where will that leave us? Probably without the happy endings, and without the happiness we so deserve.

Maybe my thought process is childish for believing in these fairytales, like small children believe in Santa Claus. But, when we were little we were always taught to dream big and discuss our life aspirations and goals. Isn’t this the same thing?

I was talking to my mom yesterday when she assured me that I shouldn’t worry and that one day I would find a man. My response, “I know I will.” I am not cocky, I am just optimistic. I am waiting for prince charming even if he arrives in a simple car with simple clothes, and not perfectly glued hair like the Disney princes I grew up looking at.

Always a princess,

M

Friends with Benefits.... Or Just Benefits?

Last night, as I flipped through the channels on the TV, I came across one of the greatest movies that came out in the past year, "Friends with Benefits." This story is the tale of two friends that decide to turn their friendship into something a little bit more, but sans emotions. As the title suggests, they decide to be friends with benefits. 


While this agreement seems to last, it eventually, of course, includes emotions. Mila Kunis falls in love with Justin Timberlake, who, as any typical guy would be: is clueless (and, is emotionally stubborn: he won't deal with his feelings.) But, as all happy ending movies do, he eventually realizes he loves her.

Kunis always spoke of how she wanted her knight in shining armor to come and rescue her one day (hmm sounds familiar.) So, when Timberlake realizes he loves her, he stages a dramatic romantic moment similar to that in her favorite movie to confess his love.


"You said you wanted to make your life like a movie, so I decided to use the real grand central instead of the fake one" he exclaims when his flash mob sings along to his favorite childhood song in the center of Grand Central Terminal.


Now, if only all men would do these grand gestures, us ladies would be happy.... and our lives would resemble our favorite movies (too bad the real JT cant be the one with the proposal, though.)


But onto the benefits part...


It used to be that if a woman had slept with a multitude of men, she was called a name (slut) or was probably turned away from a potential suitor. Now, though, my generation has flipped this completely upside down (and in turn,  offended the fight women back in the day took to gain equal rights and respect not on the basis of sexuality.)


Now, if you have not slept with a significant number of men, you may face being turned down or rejected. Instead of being labeled a "slut" you are seen to these boys (they are not quite men due to their mentality) as too much of a struggle and not an easy lay.


In 2007, about  30% of American men reported that they had sex with on average 15 or more women in their lifetime (and only 9% of women had sex with 15 or more men.)


Something is wrong with these statistics. If you talk to men aged 20-25, the average number of partners they've been with is probably somewhere between 10 and 20. This means, for almost every year of their life, they have had a sexual partner (keep in mind their sexual escapades probably only started 5-7 years ago, though.)


But, who is to blame for my generations behaviors and mentality? Is it our parents who raised us? Social media which allows us to post and share such information readily? The media which portrays sex as something casual and with "no strings attached" (that's a movie title too...) 


....or is it us? Is it our generation that allows each other to behave in such a manner?


I have to say, as much as I am frustrated with the male part of my generation I cant help but think it's us as women (or girls) who allow this to happen. Those 15-20 women each man is sleeping with, is letting it happen. She is jumping right into bed along with them.


If only we could all slow down and realize that sex has completely lost its significance. Isn't it supposed to be something shared between two people who love each other and have strong feelings towards one another (and then consummate that love physically) ? Maybe my thinking is out-dated or old fashioned, but to me I just cannot imagine that these partners my peers have are emotionally attached or have any significance.


Maybe we're all to blame for this shift, who knows.

food for thought,
M

That One True Love...

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.” - Bob Marley


While this quote is long, and I'm sure not everyone reading this read the whole thing, it is the perfect explanation of what not only I hope to find, but know I someday will.


What saddens me is that most girls do not have this belief that not only are they worthy of a man that feels that way about them but also that they will never find one anyways. Yes, I am a hopeless romantic and believe in all the fairy tales, but I really do believe that's a better way to live. When friends tell me that they cant seem to find the right guy (or vent that they never will) I cant help but wonder why they think that. Why do they believe Mr. Fictitious Man who they have created in their head will never find them and if and when he does, that he will think she isn't good enough for him?


I don't look in the mirror every day and think I'm perfect. I don't love the extra fat in a few unnamed places or the occasional blemish that pops up on my face. But, deep down I love myself. I love that I can strike up a conversation with almost anyone. I love that I have the ability to talk to people older than me. I love that I live my life the way I want to live it. And no, I am not a narcissist (although the last few sentences would lead you to believe so,) I have just found a way to love myself for both my great attributes and my pitfalls. I can recognize the things I dislike about myself and attempt to change them. And, that is the first step.


Unless you love yourself, you cannot love anyone else ... and they cannot love you either.  This is something I wish every girl in their late teens and early twenties could realize. You may be happy when you are in a relationship, but one of the most important relationships of all is the one you have with yourself. Learning to love yourself is life-changing.


When I went through my last breakup, I thought the world was crashing down upon me. I hadn't really been "single" for an extended period of time since, well, since too long. I was lost. I didn't know how I'd survive or what I'd fill my free time doing. Someone wise gave me the advice to spend the time getting to know myself. At the time, I laughed it off and thought "obviously I know myself. It's me." But, I really didn't and now looking back, I know what they meant. I have definitely matured over the course of the last year ... and I owe thanks to myself. Yes, myself. Of course there were people and experiences along the way that assisted this growth, but committing to getting to know myself and not jumping into another relationship was the best thing that I could have ever done. I know now what I like and dislike. I know now what I want out of life. I know now who I am and who I want to one day be.


My advice to girls my age: spend a little time alone. You may be lonely at times (I'm not going to say its all fun and dandy) but it's worth it. One day you'll look back as I am and say "wow, that was something I really needed to do for myself." Trust me, its worth it.


Now, onto finding my next love... because enough is enough, and I'm done with dating me.


Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.

M

"Hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable." – Wizard of Oz

Well, that quote says it all. We’ve all been through a breakup, and well, let’s just say it’s not exactly a fun thing to have to go through.  The idea of your heart being broken is a weird one. Hearts do physically break… that’s what cardiologists are for, but what about the emotional tearing of a heart? That seems to be something that no medicine, surgery, or even venting can fix. I guess a broken heart just needs some time to mend and to move on.

Ask anyone, and they will tell you they have that one breakup story that shook them completely. Whether they were dumped, broke it off with the other person, or it was mutual—love is a funny thing. What makes the heart feel such strong emotions for someone else? I’ve always pondered the thought. Is it really your heart that hurts? Is that aching really that blood pumping muscle that keeps you alive? I’m not really sure, but what I do know is that something inside you is torn when you lose a loved one.

Falling in love is something extraordinary. Your eyes may not lock across a room like in a frilly chick flick, but that heated emotion you feel when you realize it, is better than a “love at first sight” movie scene. Your heart throbs, you can’t wipe that ridiculous smile off your face, and you suddenly experience the Mean Girl’s coined term “word vomit” about the other person. Your life has suddenly taken a turn for the better, and has just brightened a little bit. Sometimes, you may even want to scream to the world, “I Love Him!”

So, how is it possible that those feelings can just go away? Forever…. Even if it takes time to get to that place. What makes the switch inside change from love to hate, or love to nothing? It’s a bizarre thing, that thing called love.

You love your parents. That’s an innate emotion. You couldn’t imagine anything bad happening to them, and if it does- your world ends. Where does that start? Does it start when as a baby you come out screaming covered in goo? Does it start once you have a better understanding of the world? And how does that emotion relate to that of a romantic relationship?

Every love song is about love and loss (or at least some version of that… country includes a dog and truck and losing them both…) and I can’t help but wonder if we’ve all gone through it, and continue to go through it, then why? Why do we have to. Is there any solution to the inevitable heartbreak?

Here’s to hoping there’s less heartbreak in the future…

I am no tin man (see title if you don't understand this.)

M

Nora Ephron Said It. Part 2

Let's just say, if Nora Ephron says it... you can't really deny it.

I have oftentimes been criticized for my wanting to just "start my life" already. What this means- is get a job, find a man, get married, and live a married life (eat, drink, and be married... sounds pretty nice, huh?) I have been told to slow down, enjoy the moment, not rush my young adult years.

But, what if I feel as if "THE" years haven't begun yet? To some, they may be college and partying and doing activities irresponsible young adults may partake in, but to me they will be walking down the aisle, being with my new husband, making a home and life together, and one day having babies (as disgusting as I currently think babies are.)

Nora Ephron once said, "when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." 

So, peeps reading this... That is how I feel, I just haven't met the guy yet who will whisk me away and make my heart melt. This is my mentality, this is who I am, and I'm proud of it.

 I'm "knot in love" but someday very soon I will be, and then my life as a hopeless romantic will begin and I will start living it.

for better or for worse,

M

I don't want to be in love... I want to be in love in a movie

I’ve oftentimes been told that I am very similar to Annie in Sleepless in Seattle. Becky (Rosie O’Donnell) yells at Annie, her best friend, when Annie is describing what she wants out of her love life after watching a chick flick, “that's your problem! You don't want to be in love. You want to be in love in a movie.” This could not be more accurate for me. But then again, who doesn’t want a head-over-heels-can’t-live-without-you romance in their life?

Nora Ephron sadly passed away at the young age of 71 due to leukemia.  For those of you who may not know her films, she is responsible for Sleepless in Seattle, You’ve Got Mail, When Harry Met Sally, and a multitude of the romantic movies that I have grown up vicariously living my life through. These movies depict messy, intense, heart-wrenching relationships that somehow seem to always pull on my heartstrings and get me to cry.

Whether its Annie and Sam’s relationship fate, or Harry and Sally’s insane friendship which turns into an intense love, or Joe Fox and Kathleen Kelly’s internet relationship which turns into a great love, these movies taught me about romance and fairytales in even the most dysfunctional relationships. I aspire to be those old couples at the end of When Harry Met Sally arguing about how me and my hubby met, who asked who out, etc (but I’d prefer to marry Joe Fox… he has a golden retriever he brings to the park in You’ve Got Mail.)

So, to show appreciation to Nora Ephron and the amazing love stories she created which helped shape my love for love, here are some of my favorite Nora Ephron movie quotes:

Right now everything is great, everyone is happy, everyone is in love and that is wonderful. But you gotta know that sooner or later you're gonna be screaming at each other about who's gonna get this dish. This eight dollar dish will cost you a thousand dollars in phone calls to the legal firm of That's Mine, This Is Yours. – 'When Harry Met Sally

Harry Burns: No man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too. 

– 'When Harry Met Sally'

All I'm saying is that somewhere out there is the man you are supposed to marry. And if you don't get him first, somebody else will, and you'll have to spend the rest of your life knowing that somebody else is married to your husband.

– 'When Harry Met Sally'

"I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."  - "When Harry Met Sally"

 

Harry: "Would you like to have dinner? Just friends."

Sally:  "I thought you didn't believe men and women could be friends."

Harry: "When did I say that?"

Sally:  "On the ride to New York."

Harry: "No, no, no, I never said that... Yes, that's right, they can't be friends. Unless both of them are involved with other people, then they can... This is an amendment to the earlier rule. If the two people are in relationships, the pressure of possible involvement is lifted... That doesn't work either, because what happens then is, the person you're involved with can't understand why you need to be friends with the person you're just friends with. Like it means something is missing from the relationship and why do you have to go outside to get it? And when you say "No, no, no it's not true, nothing is missing from the relationship," the person you're involved with then accuses you of being secretly attracted to the person you're just friends with, which you probably are. I mean, come on, who the hell are we kidding, let's face it. Which brings us back to the earlier rule before the amendment, which is men and women can't be friends." -- "When Harry Met Sally"

And once again, my all time favorite…

Annie: "Now that was when people KNEW how to be in love. They knew it! Time, distance... nothing could separate them because they knew. It was right. It was real. It was..." Beckie:  "A movie! That's your problem! You don't want to be in love. You want to be in love in a movie." – “Sleepless in Seattle"

in love, in a movie.

M

Quiz Time Thanks to TheKnot.com

During my spare time I decided to take a few quizzes on TheKnot.com to see my bridal IQ as well as what type of bride I'll be. To tell you the truth, I'm really not surprised at all.

Dear Future Husband,
Here are my quiz results. Beware, enjoy, and play along.... it's going to be fun.


Bridezilla Quiz Results
You're a Handler: Wedding planning might not be taking over your life, but you understand that it does require organization -- if you're going to spend money on flowers and food, you want to make sure that it's done right. Still, you're a bride in balance: In the end, you know the day will be great, but it doesn't have to be "perfect." So you give your bridesmaids direction but also cut them some slack; you convey a clear vision to the vendors but are flexible. And you're planning your wedding day with your fiance because you know this relationship is what it's all about, not registries and centerpieces.

Whats Your Wedding Etiquette IQ? Results
You're an etiquette ace. Rock on with your bridal self, girlfriend! You're the person that everyone goes to when they're planning their weddings -- so planning your own is a no-brainer, and it shows. But since nothing is set in stone and (with weddings) anything can happen, you should keep up with your planning information. Weddings are deeply entrenched in etiquette and, like everything else, it's better to know the rules before you decide to break them.

What's Your Proposal Style? Results
You want a public proposal: Whenhe proposes to you, you want the world (or at least a part of it) to know! Ask me to marry you on stage at a concert or show, or find a way to pop the question to me on live TV. However you decide to do it, just make sure there's a crowd -- the more cheers, the better. Extra points for you if all of her friends and family are there to see it.

Dating Now-a-Days

Dating dat·ing [ dáyting ]  : the activity of going on dates: the activity of going out regularly with somebody as a social or romantic partner

I think I was born in the wrong generation.

When Grandma & Grandpa were younger, you went on a few dates (the guy called you, picked you up, paid for you, etc) and then you either realized they were the one... or they weren't. And it was done. There was no Facebook or Twitter to see what the person was up to (or stalk what people of the opposite sex they showed up in pictures with.) You went on a date, you spoke about whatever topics interested you, you maybe kissed goodnight, and then you waited for a phone call.

My grandparents got married after just a mere month or less together. Now, that's my kind of relationship! (Dude, where are you?!)

Today, dating is a dying trend.

Boys are more likely to pick you up drunkenly in a bar than actually get up the courage to take you to dinner. Living in NYC, my eyes have been opened up to the somewhat dating scene, but after drinks and potentially one or two dinner dates, the boys all resort to the same thing: trying to "hang out." I'll leave out the implications of what "hanging out" means because I'm sure you're all well educated enough to know what that implies (synonymous with "hooking up" is my only hint.)

Girls are the ones allowing all of this to happen, though. Those girls who give in to these boys are saying "yes, what you're doing is acceptable." And, half the time, these girls go home to their girlfriends complaining that a guy doesn't call or doesn't treat her the way she wants to be treated. But, we must demand respect to a certain extent, and practice it on our own bodies. In sum: a boy is going to jump to 2nd base if you let him.

With all of the texting and social media that is involved with relationships, it's no wonder there seem to be more instances of cheating, lying, and other issues that arise. Instead of picking up the phone if someone is upset, they resort to sending "cold" or "period-filled" text messages to get a point across, instead of actually saying what's upsetting them.

It's been said that social media is changing our world (most assume for the better.... instantaneous communication, worldwide communication, the spread of information etc) but what about the other side effects? What about the fact that with a click of a button someone can send a text message that they may have never said in person... or may never have sent had they waited two minutes to think through their response.This generation needs to use social media and these readily available forms of communication and put them to good use, but in the right contexts.

FYI Gentlemen: when you're trying to pursue a lady, don't text her. Call her. Ask her how her day was. You may come to see she is much more interesting and enjoyable once you actually know her (instead of jumping into bed.)

And, that is my rambling of my frustrations with my generation, and how I wish I was born in the 1930's :)

eat. drink. and one day married
M

stories always have a beginning

According to my mom, at the young age of a preschooler, I was already coming home deciding not only who I was going to marry and the wedding song that I’d walk down the aisle to (can you feel the love tonight) but I also had a ring on my ring finger from the boy who I was calling my boyfriend.


Maybe it’s because my older sister dressed me in the wedding gown her “My-Sized Barbie” was supposed to wear (poor Barbie lay naked in the corner somewhere) or maybe it was just some bridal gene within me trying to get out. Regardless, that’s where this story, my story, starts.

Ever since I can remember, I wanted to get married. But, normally when girls say this they mean the glitz and glamor of an event. The party, the cocktails, the dress, the ring… the list goes on. For me, though, it’s definitely about those things (I’d be lying if I said that those didn’t matter) but it’s also about so much more. It’s about that fairytale idea of happily ever after: finding that one who you’ll spend the rest of your life with until you’re, well, saggy and probably not too good looking anymore regardless of how many face and eye creams you may apply at night (sorry ladies.)

Recently I told my mom I was going to buy myself a huge rock (well, with dad’s money probably) and when people asked who and where my hubby to be was, I’d reply that he’s just a little lost, and looking for me (of course.) But, reality has set in that I will be a bride-to-be for just a few more years, and that hopefully someday soon I’ll be walking down the aisle saying my “I-Do”… but definitely not to “Can You Feel the Love Tonight.”

This blog will capture the moments leading up to that time when I find “the one” following my road to find love. The ups and downs, trials and errors, and insane wedding planning (I do, afterall, have a summer internship at THE wedding website/magazine which will not be named here… and which definitely fuels the fire to my insane addiction.)

enjoy. live. love.

M