My Favorite Quote

Since it's hanging in my room at school, was pinned on my pinterest, instagramed, facebooked, and is in hebrew on my arm-candy, I figured maybe it was something I should share with you all.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

I'm not sure when this quote became my favorite, or when I decided to get it engraved on my jewelry, but it has become something that is a part of me.

We all wander this world and tend to be just a part of a crowd. But think about the ones that you love. They are your everything, they are your universe, without them there would be no reason to live. This is exactly what my favorite quote depicts. The fact that the world may not know you to be someone special, great, or even significant. You are a part of the crowd. But, to those you love (either romantically or for other purposes) you are not just a face in the crowd, you are their world.

I like the idea of this quote because regardless of your thoughts on love, romance, or anything of those matters, it stands true. We all have those rare and few people in our life who make this quote for us undeniably relevant and the truth.

And, for those of us who are romantics we can't help but think that there is someone out there who one day will make us their world.

a part of your world (had to quote the little mermaid here...)

XO,

MB

I'm Alive! I'm Alive!

So, I havent posted in a while maybe because my social life is just so wild (ha!) or beause I am totally committed to my internship and can't seem to find time to not be thinking or working towards it (this, is true. . . sadly.)

But, when I came across this article, I had to repost it. Read it peeps. Have fun. It's fabulous.

I'll be back soon to post about love, life, and other mysteries.

XO,
Melissa

Those three words are said too much, its not enough.

Listen in when people around you say goodbye on the phone, and more often than not, they say "love you" or "love ya" or some other version  of the phrase. Sure it could be to their husband, child, parent, etc. but it also tends to be to a friend (either girl or boy) or someone other than a family member.

In relationships, when you say that first "I love you" it can be really nerve-wracking... but is also considered a huge turning point in a relationship. I know that when I've said it it's been a scary emotional experience but that is intended to express the emotions that are running through my head. And, girls love to gossip about who said "I love you" first, how it was said, and do you feel the same way towards the guy. It seems as if the guy is always supposed to express it first.

I agree saying I love you can be a big deal and definitely has emotional baggage, but as of recent I've been pondering the thought of whether those three words are enough. After listening to friend's countless breakups and heartaches I can't help but wonder if those three words can oftentimes be used to stand in for genuine emotion and affection.

I'd rather spend time with a loved one and see how much they care about me (and show them how much I care for them) rather than just tell them "I love you." It is much easier to say a sentence than demonstrate true emotions which gets to the core of things.

And back to my issue with social media and texting.... if we are constantly saying "love ya" and "I love you" on wall posts, via text, and through other forms of social media, are we abusing those terms? Are we just throwing around the words that are supposed to demonstrate and replicate an emotion that should be one of the strongest?

I think we need to stop using the three word phrase so casually and show those who we love (whether its a SO, family member, etc) how much we love them before just blurting out words.

So, here's to showing those who you love how much you really love them, and hoping they can do the same in return!

love.love.love
M

post title stolen from : this great song

Sex... or Chocolate?!

Found something interesting online and thought I'd pass it along...

An online survey, which examined how singles feel about food and its relationship to dating, was conducted by TODAY.com and Match.com. Four thousand singles participated, answering questions about their dating habits, turn-ons and turn-offs.

And now to my favorite finding (and the core of this blog post)....

When asked if someone would rather give up food or sex for a year, those people who said they would choose to keep food over sex said they'd do it for only two favorite items:  Chocolate cake was number one. Number two? A big steak!

...who doesnt want this?!

In the same study, over 90 percent of male participants said that a dinner date is perfect when you're starting to see someone…. (someone tell me where these guys are!)

check out the full article here.

enjoy :)
m

Not Lonely, Just Alone

Have you ever been there? Someone asks you if you have a significant other or if you’re dating anyone… and you have to answer “no.”

 Now, there are some ways to say that no, for example: “no I actually just got over a relationship so I’m taking some time for myself” or “I’m loving being single, actually”… but no matter the answer, the person then looks at you with pity as if being single is really sad and that your life may not be as joyous or love-filled as others who may answer that question with “yes.”

The Pity Face: also known as a look of genuine concern, as if something is absolutely wrong with you. Like you've just admitted you have some illness or disease that’s incurable. (Usually is associated with “don’t worry, you’ll meet someone someday” or “it’s ok, you just haven’t found the right guy yet!”)

Why is that? Is it that terrible to be alone? Or do people just assume If you’re alone that must mean you either cannot find a compatible partner or you are in fact not compatible with others yourself? Apparently they believe you’re that sad character scooping huge chunks of ice cream out of the container in your oldest sweat pants in front of the television alone on a Saturday night…. I’m pretty sure their pity is a reassurance in a narcissistic way that the person responding to your singleness is secretly happy that… they are not you.

But, prove them wrong—little do they know, your Saturday nights are just as fun (if not more fun… hey! you get to hit on multiple men...) than theirs are.

As much as I would love to have a boyfriend and someone to call mine, this past year of being single has been one of the greatest times of my life. I have learned more about myself and who I am than I ever expected. And going on dates and learning to find conversation topics with even the duds you might be stuck grabbing drinks with, is a great learning tool (and a great way to get free drinks, food, and tickets to entertainment events... hehe!)

But back to the whole pity thing. There are three ways to deal with it:

1)      get angry and defend yourself for being single and how it’s by choice

2)      complain and say how horrible it is and how you just want to find someone already

3)      tell the person that the look on their face is offensive and call them out for their judgment

None of the three are guaranteed to work, but are probably the options you have as a single person receiving the dreaded “pity face.”

So, next time someone asks you if you have a significant other, try one of the three above, or simply respond with “I’m not lonely, I’m alone.”

alone, but having lots of fun...

M

“True love is your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.”

So last night while watching Wedding Crashers for the 100^th time, I came across a scene where Owen Wilson tries to woo Rachel McAdams with a corny love quote. His sole intention at first is to get in bed with her, until he realizes that he seems to genuinely want to get to know her (and even more-so once he figures out that she has a boyfriend.) And, she eats it right up… and even uses his corny quote in her speech as the MOH in her sister’s wedding.

“True love is your soul’s recognition of its counterpoint in another.”

While this is a silly movie, this quote stuck with me.

In the study of communications, it has been found that in fact opposites do not attract. While many would argue against this, it has been statistically proven that at first maybe opposites do attract like a magnet, but eventually a relationship between people who are drastically different will fall apart or deteriorate.

Why? You may ask…

Well, in order to be compatible with someone, it seems you must have enough in common (whether it be morals, political viewpoints, etc) in order to get along. (Think of that one person you cannot stand, and why you cannot stand them… probably because they have different viewpoints than you have.)

On the surface, some people may seem to be opposites and have a very functional relationship. Take my parents, for example… mom’s type-A, and pretty serious, while dad’s the typical jokester. But, deep down they have very similar views on a multitude of subjects. And whala! Great relationship.

For those who would argue “well I’m sooo different from the person I’m dating and we are in love” that’s a lie. Eventually you’ll realize you have more in common than you believe you originally did, and that is what the driving force is behind the success of the relationship.

But now, back to the quote.

First off, I love the quote. I feel that it epitomizes what I’ve tried to say about love all along: that something inside you just feels it. Something realizes that the other person is right for you, belongs with you, and is meant for you. Yes, corny as always, but hey! Just go with it. Sometimes you need that other person to complete you… to finish your sentences… to just be around.

So, my soul will continue to be on the hunt for its counterpoint, so that one day, it is complete.

Until then,

M

Friends, Lovers, or Nothing?

We all remember that infamous quote in When Harry Met Sally when Harry and Sally debate whether a man and a woman can be friends. Of course, Sally says they can… and Harry says it’s nearly impossible because at some point the man wants to sleep with the woman. I had a similar debate with someone yesterday.

I have friends of the opposite sex who I am extremely close with. I’d consider them some of my best friends. But, according to most, this won’t last long.  To me, this seems ridiculous and immature… so I decided to do a little research.  (Below is a little snippet of what I found for those interested)

Within these boundaries of gender generalizations, the vast majority of post-pubescent, heterosexual men will invariably have a sexual desirability "reflex" upon seeing a female of reproductive age. Thus the immediate discrimination that a male will make when encountering a female is whether or not he'd like to have sex with her. While some women might acknowledge this sexual "reflex" too, it is likely that they can quickly get past it and focus on the non-sexual aspects of the male with whom they're relating. On the one hand, sperm is physiologically cheap, extremely plentiful, and constantly replenished. Therefore, the more often and diversely a male spreads his sperm the more evolutionally successful he'll be. Ova, on the other hand, are very precious, metabolically expensive, and can not be replenished (a woman is born with all the eggs she'll ever have).Thus women are more able to move beyond the immediate sexual attraction inherent in inter-gender relationships so they can more thoroughly determine the overall suitability of a potential mate. Men, it seems, often have no such long-term agenda so the "one track mind" of sexual interest persists much longer. In general, then, one can say that men are very sexually "reflexive" while women are apt to be more sexually "reflective."

So basically, it’s deeply engrained in us as a member of a specific gender.

But what now? Do I accept the fact that at some point a friend (who is more like a brother to me) will have these feelings whether he decides to disclose them or not? Or, do I just pretend I never read the article and continue being “bff”?

I think that there needs to be an updated version for this day-in-age of male and female friends. Back when women remained in the home, there might have been a different sentiment if they were off being "friendly" with other men other than their significant other. Today, when women are  prominent figures in the workplace AND the home, it seems as if times are changing.

Just a thought to ponder on a warm sunny day.

Friends, Lovers, or Nothing (as John Mayer would say..)

M